Forgiveness

If you’re alive, then you must be facing an issue that requires forgiveness. I would say it’s a perpetual recurring theme that challenges over and over again. Yet dealing with it can be tricky, and navigating through the series of steps that need to be taken to mend the situation is agonizing yet healing.

So how do we do it? How do we get to the point where we can be at ease with what had hurt without reacting in a negative manner? How it would be magical to say it’s simple if you just follow these directions and voila’ it’s been resolved. But I don’t have to-do lists to give for you to follow. However, what I can offer you is my understanding.

I do not believe in the saying ‘forgive and forget’, as I find that it lacks responsibility and growth. If we are to forget, then surely we are to repeat the situation over and over again. But I do believe in forgiving and moving on by building stronger bridges or having to cut ties.

And sometimes, forgiving others can come easier than forgiving ourselves, especially with the small stuff. Sometimes we expect to know better than to let ourselves be in a position where we get hurt. But you know what? It is going to happen, and no matter how high our expectations are, we are always going find ourselves in such positions and it’s okay to be kind to ourselves.

The key to my understanding is that being imperfect we are bound to step on each other’s toes, and it is impossible to be in control of everything that happens to us all the time. I generally believe that we are all doing the best that we can from our limiting backgrounds and personalities. I find that humor can salvage the little situations and can go a long way. While when it comes to bigger issues such as betrayal and abuse, understanding that we are only in control in the way we react to these situations and moving away is perhaps the key finding peace once more.

Why pursue this? Think of the moments you managed to let go and move past what happened, wasn’t it lighter and freer from those incessant thoughts that kept weighing you down? Weren’t you able to look up at the sky in its grandiosity and breathe refreshingly rather than stare at it without really seeing what you’re looking at? Or for a simpler day to day life example, able to sleep soundly without having to go over the scenario over and over till the early hours of the day? We all want to be unshackled and putting in the effort to confront the pain in order to forgive puts us in a position to be able to experience joy once more.

With this, I wish you a Happy New Year! May it bring prosperity in love, wealth and happiness.